Royai Picnic
by amichka
Summary: Royai. Roy's surprise date with Riza turns into a group picnic in the park. Rated for safety from light language. Read and Review!


It had only been a month since Roy had decided to ask Riza out on a date. She had hesitated somewhat, but agreed. He took her to the nicest restaurant in Central and bought her a beautiful silver necklace, but she was not impressed. Of course she had cared deeply for him since they had first met, but he had a reputation with women, and rubbed off his charm and caring as a playboy act. Then he did something that she never expected. He confessed. He told her of his love for her.

They had been seeing each other secretly, knowing it was against the rules, and that they'd both loose their jobs if anyone found out.

One day they decided to play hooky. Roy made a picnic lunch and headed to HQ. "Riza!" He whispered loudly into his office. He went in, turned on the lights and shut the door behind him.

"Wutcha doin' looking for Hawkeye, chief? Got plans?" Havoc said with a smirk that rivaled Roy's usual one. In fact all of his subordinates were there, besides Riza, and normally he would have asked what they were all doing there so early with the lights off, if he hadn't been so freaked out.

"Uh..." Roy hid the basket behind his back. "I-I'm not looking for H-Hawkeye. I was..."

"Is that a picnic basket, Colonel?" asked Breda. "Were you going on a date with the Lieutenant?"

"N-No! This is for the...uh...staff picnic!" Roy said, half asking. "Cool, who all's invited?" Breda asked excitedly. Roy realized his mistake and thought frantically for a way out. "Uh..." At that moment, the door opened and Riza walked in. Roy blushed and looked at her pleadingly.

"Hawkeye!" He said a little too loudly. "May I see you in the hall please?" "I suppose so, sir." He practically threw himself out the door, dragging Riza behind him.

"Thank goodness you're here! I was about to blow our cover!" He said.

"What? What happened?"

"Um...I sorta turned my surprise date into a group picnic." "Ugh!" she said. "Wait! Let's just sneak off now!" She blurted out. "You have everything, right?" "Yeah" he said gesturing to the basket. A flirty smile grew on Roy's face ans the two began to sneak down the hall until...

"Hey, are you guys ready to go?" called Havoc down the hall to the pair. Roy stopped and turned around slowly. His entire staff stood in casual clothing, each holding a small basket of food. Roy sighed deeply and looked to Riza with an "I'm sorry" look on his face. He was relieved when she smiled back.

"Okay everyone, we just need to change and then we'll go." Riza said. Roy headed to the mens locker room and Riza to the womens.

Roy slipped out of his uniform and pulled on a pair of worn down jeans. Then he dug through his bag until he found a clean blue shirt and slipped it over his head. He threw everything into his locker and left. Riza was already waiting in the hallway. She wore a pink blouse and a casual white skirt.

"You ready, sir?" She said motioning to the others. He sighed and said "Yes, Lieutenant, let's get going." They all walked down the hall. Riza looked over at Roy who was guiltily watching his feet. She looked to make sure the others were busy. Then she took his chin in her hand and kissed him, lightly.

"You look good in jeans." She whispered playfully. "And you look beautiful…always." He said. She blushed and turned away. He smiled and continued to watch the toe of his shoe hit the floor as he walked. In his moment of distraction, the door in front of him slammed open and sent Roy to the ground clutching his face.

"Damn: Roy sat up. "Is it bad?" he asked moving his hands. "Oh Colonel! Your nose is bleeding! I'll get you a wet rag!" said Riza running towards the restroom.

"Who the hell was that!" yelled Roy. "Heh heh..." came a familiar voice from behind the door. "Sorry about...oh...it's just Mustang..." said Ed coming out of the room. "Fullmetal! What's the matter with you?"

"Nothing! You're the one who doesn't watch where you're...Oh! Are guys going somewhere?" Roy's eyes widened in panic. He opened his mouth to say something, when Fuery said "We're going on a staff picnic, Ed!" Ed bent down to smell the picnic lunch. "Yummmmm...smells good! C-can I come?" "A-and me too?" asked Al coming out from the door that had just smacked Roy in the face.

Everyone turned to the sound of someone coming down the hallway. Riza had returned with a wet washcloth and a bandaid. She sat behind Roy and leaned him back onto her lap. It wasn't really that bad, actually, but Roy was enjoying it the attention.

"Here, Colonel." She said wiping of the blood to reveal a cut across the bridge of his nose. She put the bandaid over it and helped him up. "Where are you two boys headed?" She asked noticing Ed and Al. "It doesn't matter now! We wanna go on a picnic with you guys! I'm starved!" Said Ed. Roy put his face in his hands and moaned at the degree of his mistake. Riza put her hand on Roy's shoulder.

When they reached the park, Al pointed out the perfect spot. At the bottom of the hill next to a small stream, there was a shady area. It would have been very romantic if it weren't for Ed, Al, Havoc, Breda, Falman, and Feury.

Falman spread the blanket out over the soft grass and set the baskets on top of it. Everyone sat down on the blanket. Breda opened a basket and breathed in the scent. "Smells good, Colonel! Did you make it yourself?" "Uh, yeah I did." said Roy. "It smalls delicious sir!" said Feury.

'Maybe this won't be so bad,' thought Roy. 'Everything seems pretty peaceful.' "Uh huh! Dis is gud, Mushtang!" He spoke too soon. Ed and Havoc were digging into the food at an alarming rate. The food that was meant to be eaten by him and Riza on their date.

"Give me some of that!" Called Breda, snatching a chicken leg out of Ed's hand. "Hey that was mine!" Shouted Ed. "Brother, please! Control yourself!" "I want some!" "Hey! Don't take my sandwich, small fry!" "WHO YOU CALLING SO SMALL HE'D HAFTA PICNIC WITH THE ANTS AND DOESN'T NEED HIS OWN SANDWICH?" Shouted Ed, pusheing everyone off the blanket. Feury flew into the stream and made a small splash.

Everyone looked over to him and it got very quiet. the small mousey man looked like he was about to cry. Everyone watched him nervously. "Why I outta!" He jumped from the creek flailing his fists. Everyone had gone completely crazy. Everyone but Roy, Riza, and Al (who was sighing at his short-tempered brother).

Ed pulled Havoc's hair, Breda punched Feury in the face. Havoc took Ed by the leg and flung him over. Falman was sprawled out underneath everyone. Eager to get up, he bit the nearest ankle, which just happened to be Breda's. Al was busy trying to calm everyone down.

Chicken, and salad, and sandwiches were flying everywhere. Roy looked over at Riza who was attempting to stop the fighting. He picked up the nearest picnic basket and grabbed her hand. She looked at him, startled, then smiled understandingly.

He guided her to a romantic hill on the other side of the park. He handed her the basket and took ou the small blanket. He laid it out and took out two glasses and a bottle of wine. She sat down facing the lake. "Hey, Riza, that was pretty crazy back there, huh?" She looked up at him as he poured the wine.

She took her glass from him as he sat beside her. "But I don't want to talk about that..." he said, setting down his glass and taking her face in his hands. He kissed her and she put her arm around him and they fell backwards.

"Stop!" Al shouted over their bickering. Everyone suddenly stopped fighting and looked up at Al. "You're all acting insane!" Ed, who was holding Feury up by his hair, dropped the Sargent from his grasp and stood up. "Heh heh, sorry Al!" Everyone let go of the person he was fighting and sat down like nothing had happened.

"Hey, where's the Colonel?" asked Breda. Everyone looked around. "And Hawkeye's missing as well." Stated Falman. "And that damned Mustang took the last picnic basket!" Shouted Ed. "I'm still hungry!" They all split up to search for the missing soldiers.

Ed and Al searched the playground. All they found were a 'bunch of whiny brats.' "Hey, get off me kid! I'm too old to be playing with a bunch babies!" Ed said, pulling away from the little girls grasp. "But you're so small. How old awr u?"

Ed's face went dark and he clenched his fists. "WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THAT HE COULD BE MISTAKEN FOR A LITTLE KID IN A PLAYGROUND?" Called Ed, flailing and grunting, while Al held him back from the innocent little girl.

Havoc and Breda checked the bog garden. They walked down the wooden trail of bridges, admiring the beautiful swamp flowers. "Hey look, Breda, geese! Let's go see." said Havoc running out onto the dock. "Wait up!" said Breda following him.

"Have you seen the Colonel, little guy?" asked Havoc jokingly and leaned down to look the bird in the eyes. The goose bit him hard on the nose. "Ahhoww ow ow oww!" Shouted Havoc. He kicked the bird hard into the water. "Stupid dumb animal!"

The geese flew up out of the lake attacking the now fleeing lieutenants. They screamed and ran from the birds as fast as they could.

Falman and Feury checked the other side of the park. They searched every tree, every bench, and every picnic table. They finally came to a peaceful couple sleeping on a hill.

"Um...excuse me?" asked Feury. "Have you seen...uh..." he stopped immediately after realizing who lay before them. Roy was lying on the blanket with one knee in the air. One hand clutched an empty wine glass and the other arm was supporting Riza. She was cuddled up to Roy with her face halfway buried in his shirt.

"Uh..." muttered Falman, as the others came running. Ed's hair poofed out in all directions and Al had sand stuck to his armor. Havoc and Breda were covered in bruises and bandages. "Don't ask..." said Breda, giving an evil glare to Havoc, who raised his hands defensively.

"So, where are they?" asked Ed. "Well..." said Falman, moving out of the way to reveal the sleeping colonel and his first lieutenant. Everyone was very quiet for a moment. "I knew there was something going on between them..." said Havoc, breaking the silence. "So this really WAS a date!" said Breda. "A-and we kinda ruined it..." said Feury.

Ed who had been surprisingly quiet thus far, closed his gaping mouth. "Uh, yeah..." he said. "Al and I hafta go...uh...look for the Philosopher's Stone!" He grabbed Al and ran off, giggling. "A-and, you know, we should really be getting back to work!" said Breda. "Yeah!" said Falman and Feury together running through the park.

"Damn!" Havoc whispered to himself, still glaring at the sleeping pair. "I was gonna ask her out!" "Uhg" moaned Breda, grabbing his arm, and pulling him along behind him.


End file.
